THIS IS MUMBAI CALLING……………MUMBAI CALLING……….

Sitting here in Mumbai, or Navi Mumbai to be more accurate, with the Indian general elections and the credit crunch behind us, pathetic monsoon and H1N1 notwithstanding there is a feeling of being at the very forefront of the recovering world economy. The vexed question whether India is ‘decoupled’ or not seems almost academic in the face of 6 percent plus growth, forecast to increase to 9 percent within the next few months. Of course people here who see the world via The Times of India or The Hindustan Times with their expansive and insightful coverage of world affairs - one page mostly dedicated to Hollywood gossip – have liitle or no idea of how the current economic conditions are really affecting the rest of the world. And just because the growth is not in double figures they will keep on calling it a ‘recession’!

I have often mentioned that India is very sensitive about how the rest of the world sees it, bridling at the merest hint of criticism and glorying at the slightest sign of superiority – ‘The new world champion tiddlywinks players grandfather came from Delhi!’ the media will trumpet. Well the newspapers, with the possible exception of the ultra conservative ‘Hindu’ also love to stir things up and so any report that may suggest that things are not absolutely 100% rosy here is usually emblazoned across the front pages. And so today we have a report that Mumbai is one of the lowest paid cities in the world and I don’t doubt it, this is a low pay economy in the first place and in Mumbai with the ceaseless immigration from the surrounding countryside and already vast population, competition for jobs force rates down even further. In Mumbai a decent degree ( and I mean a decent degree from one of the Indian Institute Universities and not one from one of the many hundreds of ‘private universities’ that churn out semi literate morons) will get you maybe a grand a year, a doctorate maybe a grand and a half – and these are ‘well paid’ jobs don’t forget. Then there’s the news that Mumbai has some of the highest levels of carcinogens and other pollutants in its air and it is certainly the case that there is a constant brownish haze, makes for nice sunsets mind you….. Also in today’s news along side the usual run of rapes, murders and lynchings (increasingly fashionable this year it seems) is the fact that the police force in Mumbai is so poorly paid and so overworked that it is running at half strength and many police stations are closed as they don’t have the staff to occupy them. On a more positive note the anti terrorist squad have been issued with some shiny new automatic weapons that are described in the Times of India as , get this, ‘sexy’.

Nevertheless, the feeling is positive, India’s banks have not overstretched themselves, the economic stimulus packages produced by the central government were miniscule compared to the rest of the world and infrastructure development is underway big time. In fact India’s relative isolationism both culturally as well as financially has been of great benefit. And talking of cultural isolationism I have been amazed and pleasantly surprised to discover a prog metal band from Chennai called Motherjane who are actually very good- check out  their album ‘Maktub’. This is really amazing considering that India doesn’t really do ‘rock’ music, no, that’s not correct, it does but ‘not as we know it’. A typical Indian ‘Rock’ band is a sort of bastard offspring of Elvis Presley and Gary Glitter – with  moustaches, they’re big on glitter and basic twelve bar grooves but that’s about it, pretty much all of the male bollywood stars have a ‘rock band’ but don’t go there, no, really, please, just don’t! So anyway out of the blue I discover that there is actually a band making really good melodic proggy metal with a subtle Indian influence, but look at their website 40,000 downloads! So few! Architects have half a million for each song they put up…. Just goes to show that India is not ready for such radical stuff. And why should they be? They prefer their own music like they prefer their own food, however I cant help but think that this is in part due to accessibility, remember that the vast majority of the population doesn’t have access to a computer or even a CD player come to that. 

I’ve been fancying a change to Indian food recently, and I don’t mean Indian Chinese or Indian Italian I mean food that has no Indian influence whatsoever and it’s almost impossible to find. Next time I’m bringing some pasta, some Arborio rice and some herbs, at least I should be able to make risottos and pastas that actually taste Italian ( get me, the ‘international’ chef eh?) Oh yes and I’ll need some parmesan as well. I may even plan a dinner party have a few folks round to try it, but perhaps not, I’m fairly confident they wouldn’t like it, reckoning it tasteless and bland. Green salad is another thing I crave, difficult to get particularly lettuce so maybe I should bring some cut and come again green salad seed. Then I would have to get other difficult or impossible to get items like potting compost and pots. Still worth a try I reckon. Finally there’s bread and even though I love roti in all its huge number of forms, I really miss a decent crusty loaf so next visit I’m also bringing my bread maker and some dried yeast.

Finally dear reader, medical news and a trip to Vashi.....

I've got some kind of conjunctivitis type eye infection at present and last night went to my nearest proper city, Vashi, jewel of New Bombay, to visit an eye specialist, well, as you may imagine that was a story in itself but I was blown away by the street decorations for the soon-to-end Ganpatti festival, all the streets in the city centre are absolutely plastered with strings of coloured lights, like an Indian vesion of Blackpool illuminations, Ashok, my driver told me that this was nothing and that I should see what they do in Pune. I had no idea that this was going on half an hour down the road from where I live and it made me feel somehow Christmassy to see the streets thronging with people, the lights and the music blaring on every street corner. Clearly I havent been getting out enough.......